#27 is here and again, NO SCRIPT!  See how funny we can really be without a script! We play more rounds of "Would You Rather" which is a hilarious game of extreme options and comes from wouldyourather.com, we're stumped on an "underwear saying", we talk about Bill's unfortunate accident! We hear a vicodin horror story, Bob & Bill in a Kum & Go commercial?, last week's poll results, a visit from our friend Larry the Rabid Ranter, Bob's bytch segment, we quote some funny things over heard in New York over at overheardinnewyork.com, what a degree is worth, and the Redneck Dictionary Word of the day/week. Be sure and vote on the NEW poll, which do you prefer with your Thanksgiving meal? BEEF GRAVY, TURKEY GRAVY, OTHER GRAVY or I DON'T LIKE GRAVY! You can also vote by leaving a voicemail at the "hotline" 206-339-2783 (206-33-WASTE).

Wow...we're not using a script and we don't do any of the old stuff we usually do (except for the Redneck Dictionary Word of the Day. We talk about hour our "voting" days went on election day. We play "Would You Rather" which is a hilarious game of extreme options and that comes from wouldyourather.com, we quote some funny things over heard in New York over at overheardinnewyork.com and of course we can't forget about those attack ads against the Bob and Bill Show! Be sure and vote on the NEW poll, would you rather LISTEN TO THE BOB AND BILL SHOW or SUFFER THE SAME FATE AS SADDAM HUSSEIN? You can also vote by leaving a voicemail at the "hotline" 206-339-2783 (206-33-WASTE).

This is the place where I had our 25th show comments!  We took so long in between podcasts that I forgot how things worked on the website and created our new show on top of our anniversary show.  Forgive me!

Top Ten List that we read off during the show:

Looking for it in the archives...

 Episode #24--  Bob's back....gone again! But we'll call him and see what he's up to and play a game of 20Q.  Be sure and vote on the NEW poll, do you like THE BEATLES or NICKELBACK better? You can also vote by leaving a voicemail at the "hotline" 206-339-2783 (206-33-WASTE).

Top Ten List that we read off during the show:

TOP TEN SIGNS YOU HAVE A BAD HALLOWEEN COSTUME

10. You get pelted with teeth and asked for money because kids think you're the real tooth fairy
 9. You call up your buddy Barry Bonds so he can help you turn into the real Incredible Hulk
 8. Your prison uniform gets you calls from the Oakland Raiders to join their team
 7. You rob all the local blood banks so you can become a vampire
 6. You've lost so much weight you can go as the "skeleton guy"
 5. All you need for your witch costume is a broom. You already have the green skin, bad acme and a nose that screams plastic surgery
 4. You win 1st prize in the scariest costume category with your Bob & Bill costume
 3. Your head wound costume is homemade with real stab wounds and all
 2. Your Superman costume is a little too tight which shows that you're really not "super" at all
 1. Your crafting skills on your ghost costume looks more like a KKK hood

Episode #24--  Bob's back? Yep! And he's in rare form too! We give a little "diss" to SPRINT in the bytch forum, plus big news to get out of your Sprint contract without the penalty fee! We re-read your e-mails and comments, play a game of 20Q and mention announcements on DVDs to be released. Be sure and vote on the poll, do you like HOT or MILD wings? You can also vote by leaving a voicemail at the "hotline" 206-339-2783 (206-33-WASTE).  Got any ideas on what Bob and Bill should do or try next? Send in your suggestions to start up another new poll!

Top Ten List that we read off during the show:

TOP TEN SIGNS YOU ARE AN INTERNET JUNKIE

10. When giving directions to a stranger, you keep saying "information superhighway"
 9. You wonder if people want to see your "MYSPACE"
 8. You dip computer chips in sauce at supper time
 7. You write a top ten list about the signs you are a junkie
 6. People tell you, "Hey, you're a computer junkie!"
 5. You had to visit the emergency room after you thought you hurt yourself during a war video game
 4. You legally change your initials to W.W.W.
 3. Your hot Friday night date is a night in the computer lab
 2. Your best pick-up line is, "Hey, baby, wanna see my hard drive?"
 1. Your school GPA is 2.5 gigabytes

Episode #23--  Uh oh...where's Bob? Eh, Bill can handle the show by himself...or can he?  Listen and find out.  Bill tries some NEW stuff like DVD Releases, talking to the "scary" expert (a.k.a. his sister), reads e-mails and comments, plays a "rock and roll" song and steals a TOP TEN list from Bob's archives.  Shhhh...don't tell Bob! Don't forget to call us and leave a voicemail 206-339-2783 (206-33-WASTE).  Got any ideas on what Bob and Bill should do or try next? Send in your suggestions to start up the new poll!

Top Ten List that we read off during the show:

TOP TEN CHANGES YOU MIGHT SEE TO SUPERHEROES

10. Captain America gets fed up with the government, defects out of country to become Captain Paraguay
 9. Plastic Man finally snaps, dies
 8. Wonder Woman tires of saving the world, takes job as waitress at Hooters
 7. Xena's secret identity is ruined when she agrees to pose nude for Playboy
 6. Kryptonite does not kill Superman, it just changes him into some loser named @R$%N %R#&!D
 5. Aquaman swims too close to that beach in Florida and is eaten by sharks
 4. Bruce Wayne loses fortune in day trading, forced to sell costume on eBay
 3. Spiderman is finished when he confuses webfluid with RAID
 2. The Incredible Hulk is told by his partner that he isn't "incredible" after all, if you know what I mean
 1. President Bush is impeached

Bob and Bill have taken the week off to spend time with family and to take a step back and really see if there is a need anymore for a podcast.  Do we have ANY more listeners out there?  If you want MORE Bob and Bill, e-mail us at bobandbillshow@gmail.com and express your concern, happiness, or excitement that Bob and Bill have taken a week off!

Episode #22--  The post-drunk survival party is here....well, just the latest installment of slapped together crap for your pleasure.  Funny Holidays, comments on the website, a dastardly good email segment, a visit from our friend Larry, 20 Questions game show, small blurb about football, and the Redneck Word of the week.   Remember to send us your word to try and beat the game of 20 Questions.  Don't forget to call us and leave a voicemail 206-339-2783 (206-33-WASTE).  Got any ideas on what Bob and Bill should do or try next? Send in your suggestions to start up the new poll!

Top Ten List that we read off during the show:

TOP TEN SIGNS BAD SPORTS EUPHEMISMS FOR SEX

10. Clean Jerk (weightlifting)
 9. The Breast Stroke (swimming)
 8. Tight End (football)
 7. Go Deep! (football)
 6. It's mating season (hunting)
 5. Penetration (football)
 4. Mount that horse! (horse riding)
 3. Body check (hockey)
 2. I'm tight or I'm loose (auto racing)
 1. Rack 'em! (billiards)

Episode #21--It's official, we're LEGAL to drink on this episode!  Bob and Bill go for Power Hour 2 and set some new goals and records! For our wicked wasted good pics: click here.  Funny Holidays, comments on the website, a visit from our friend Larry, 20 Questions game show, a good ol' drinking song, Redneck Word of the week and LOTS of sound effects!  Remember to send us your word to try and beat the game of 20 Questions.  Don't forget to call us and leave a voicemail 206-339-2783 (206-33-WASTE).  Got any ideas on what Bob and Bill should do or try next? Send in your suggestions to start up the new poll!

Top Ten List that we read off during the show:

TOP TEN SIGNS YOU'VE HAD TOO MUCH TO DRINK

10. You think it's a good idea to convert to Islam
 9. Rotary club calendars sound like a good idea
 8. You think Katie Couric looks better without being doctored up
 7. It's ok to take a microphone into the bathroom
 6. You start getting aroused while looking at Bob's picture
 5. You like to try different baby foods on a podcast
 4. Your name is Mel Gibson
 3. Ethanol is less filling, but tastes great
 2. Your Busch is light
 1. You're laughing at this stupid Top Ten list

Episode #20--Baby food, baby food on the wall, which one is the most colorful of them all?  Can we withstand these NASTY tastes? Tune in to find out!  For some good pics: click here.  Funny Holidays, comments on the website, a visit from our friend Larry, 20 Questions game show, a funny song geared off of the 20Q word and the Redneck Word of the week.  Remember to send us your word to try and beat the game of 20 Questions.  Don't forget to call us and leave a voicemail 206-339-2783 (206-33-WASTE).  Got any ideas on what Bob and Bill should do or try next? Send in your suggestions to start up the new poll!

Top Ten List that we read off during the show:

TOP TEN REJECTED EMMY CATEGORIES

10. Most outstanding pronunciation of Hezbollah
 9. Best elimination of the ninth planet
 8. Outstanding firing of Tom Cruise
 7. Most countries angered by U.S. Government
 6. Best Bob, Best Bill
 5. Fastest vomiting of the baby food tasting test
 4. Best athletic supporter
 3. Best imitation of a funny Top Ten list
 2. Best supporting podcaster in a dramatic or comedic, reality series containing a foreign language with a musical score director and a special effects producer guest appearing in a...aw...SCREW IT!
 1. Outstanding portrayal of a lame podcast

Episode #19--Bill is back from vacation.  He talks about his adventures which are also included in the Bytch Forum.  For those of you having trouble opening a beer bottle here are some ways to do it: click here  Funny Holidays, is Mars going to be close? Comments on the website, a visit from our friend Larry, 20 Questions game show, dirty joke of the week, and the Redneck Word of the week.  Remember to send us your word to try and beat the game of 20 Questions.  Don't forget to call us and leave a voicemail 206-339-2783 (206-33-WASTE).  Vote on our baby food poll because this is the LAST week for it.  Next week, is the taste testing event extravaganza!  Vote for bananas MOM!

Top Ten List that we read off during the show:

TOP TEN DELL EXCUSES

10. Didn't realize XPS meant EXPLODES
 9. Our bomb is comparable to that new Paris Hilton album
 8. Damn Energizer Bunny was juicin' again
 7. Someone rigged the polls and no wait, that's a re-count
 6. Figured this was the easiest way to get rid of annoying spam e-mail
 5. Wanted to prove that Bush isn't the only person that can blow things up
 4. Apple promised a printer for every ten computers blown up
 3. Our Dell computers run as good as Bob can say Hezbollah
 2. We warned you not to download the Bob and Bill Show
 1. Dude, you got a dud!

Episode #18--Bill runs away for an episode due to a nasty dispute with Bob over a checkers game.  No, no, that's not really true.  Bill does a remote from out of state (on vacation, mind you) while Bob suffers another week of non-vacation.  We tribute Elvis, among other things, along with the usual trash:  Funny Holidays, e-mails, a visit from our friend Larry, 20 Questions game show, and dirty joke of the week.  Remember to send us your word to try and beat the game of 20 Questions.  Don't forget to call us and leave a voicemail 206-339-2783 (206-33-WASTE).  Vote on our beautiful poll also.

Top Ten List that we read off during the show:

TOP TEN REJECTED FOODS ON A STICK AT THE IOWA STATE FAIR

10. Cool Whip
 9. Bush
 8. Hezbollah
 7. CIETC
 6. Bob or Bill
 5. Sorry, due to Bill's vacation there is no number 5 for this list
 4. Steroids
 3. Soup
 2. **Bleep**
 1. Stick?  Stick this up your ass!

Episode #17--The Iowa State Fair is near and we'll talk a bit about what goes into a FAIR to make it a FAIR! Bill describes yet another edition of the Balloon Ride Blues, haunted barbie doll (click here to see the ebay auction), Dixie Chicks? What's a Dixie Chick? The Who? Exactly! Funny Holidays, e-mails, a visit from our friend Larry, 20 Questions game show, and dirty joke of the week.  Remember to send us your word to try and beat the game of 20 Questions.  Don't forget to call us and leave a voicemail 206-339-2783 (206-33-WASTE).  And go and vote on our Baby Food poll for cryin' out loud!

Top Ten List that we read off during the show:

TOP TEN REJECTED AMUSEMENT PARK RIDES

10. The Swallower
 9. The Manure Spreader
 8. The Drowner
 7. Dirty Nose Adventure
 6. Urine Rafting
 5. Spin Yourself 'Til You Barf
 4. The Israeli Invader
 3. The Gas Siphoner
 2. The Drunk Driver
 1. The Syringe-O-Round

Episode #16--We talk about the stormy ride home from KC,  Balloon Ride Blues, Funny Holidays, e-mails, comments, a visit from our friend Larry, and another installment of 20 Questions .  Remember to send us your ideas or requests for a special show ending movie quote, funny clip, etc.  And, don't forget to call us and leave a voicemail 206-33-WASTE(9-2783)

Top Ten List that we read off during the show:

TOP TEN THINGS OVERHEARD ON RAGBRAI 2006

10. Smell that fresh hog lot contaminated air!
 9. CIETC's paying me a bundle to do this
 8. I haven't been in this much heat since Bob's prom night
 7. Look, Mel Gibson is being pulled over on his 10-speed
 6. The winner gets control of Cuba
 5. I thought the only doping going on was in the White House
 4. Get out of my way, I'm off to invade the Israeli beer stand
 3. Yo baby, wanna see some of my synthetic testosterone?
 2. Hey Lance, I'll trade you my syringe for your Bud Light
 1. RAGBRAI, who gives a rat's ass?!

Episode #15--We are on the road to Kansas City, MO to see the Royals battle the Orioles!  Listen to us ramble on the way to the game, sing during the seventh inning stretch and play 20 Questions on the way home.  Remember to send us your ideas or requests for a special show ending movie quote, funny clip, etc.  And, don't forget to call us and leave a voicemail 206-33-WASTE(9-2783)

Top Ten List that we read off during the show:

TOP TEN REASONS BOB AND BILL HAVE TAKEN THE SHOW ON THE ROAD

10. Figured enough $10 beers at game would make show funnier
 9. It's Bob and Bill bobblehead night in Kansas City
 8. Wanted to beat old time record through road construction obstacle course
 7. Needed to get out of town after running over family of RAGBRAI riders
 6. Nothing spells fun more than high gas cost, high ticket cost, and cheap city hookers
 5. Hoping to find Israeli woman to invade Bill's pants
 4. Wanted to be in first 20,000 fans who get free syringes
 3. Chants of "you suck" directed at game, not show
 2. Wanted to see players suck as bad as Bob's prom night
 1. Three famous words: Des Moines sucks

Episode #14--Why is it so HOT?, WHY is Vice President Dick Cheney in IOWA of all places?  Send us your Baby Food flavor suggestions for us to eat and describe on air bobandbillshow@gmail.com  Funny Holidays (with a birthday wish), E-mails, comments.  Here is where we get our funny NEWS from BONGONEWS.com and funny SPORTS from SPORTSPICKLE.com  Laugh at our CLEAN Joke of the Week, remember to send us your ideas or requests for a special show ending movie quote, funny clip, etc.  And, don't forget to call us and leave a voicemail 206-33-WASTE(9-2783)

Top Ten List that we read off during the show:

TOP TEN THINGS YOU DON'T WANT YOUR BIRTHDAY CARD TO TELL YOU

10.  Good news! We have enough firemen to handle the candles on your cake this year
 9.  The judge says you're my daddy
 8.  Happy Birthday! Love, Oprah
 7.  This is from your good friends, Bob & Bill
 6.  Didn't I beat you up in grade school?
 5.  You're still good looking even with your gnarled teeth and thinning hair
 4.  I really loved you when you were one of the Dixie Chicks
 3.  This new Top Ten list is your gift!
 2.  How about dinner tonight? Sincerely, Robert Blake
 1.  Happy New Year!

Episode #13--See what we did on July 4th week and hear what Bill ATE!  (He's also drinking during the podcast as well).  We talk sh*t...LITERALLY (along with a related movie recommendation).  See how Keith Richards made the news, we talk World Cup action, Funny Holidays (with a birthday wish), baseball records, bytch forum, Larry the rabid ranter stops by, backwards game show **To try and figure out this weeks BACKWARDS WORD, CLICK HERE and submit your answers/guesses to bobandbillshow@gmail.com Here is where we get our funny NEWS from BONGONEWS.com and funny SPORTS from SPORTSPICKLE.com  Laugh at our Dirty Joke of the Week, remember to send us your ideas or requests for a special show ending movie quote, funny clip, etc.  And, don't forget to call us at 206-33-WASTE(9-2783)

Top Ten List that we read off during the show:

TOP TEN REASONS DES MOINES WAS SNUBBED BY THE NCAA

10.  Have you been on I-235 lately?
 9.  Champions on Ice? We'll just leave it at that
 8.  Afraid that Bob & Bill Show will scare away all the fans
 7.  Keith Richards is building us a pirate ship to play in
 6.  Using money donated by CIETC staff to build a bigger arena
 5.  This number was more popular than the Wells Fargo Arena
 4.  Did you hear about the virus Ames just got?
 3.  Elma High School gym is bigger than the Wells Fargo Arena, just ask Bob's prom date...oh wait...nevermind
 2.  All of the food at the concession stands are on a stick! Even the beer!
 1.  Three popular words: Des Moines Sucks!

Episode #12--We give you a final College World Series update, read your e-mails, lots of funny holidays, baseball records, Bytch Forum (formerly known as Say What!), Larry the Rabid Ranter stops by AGAIN, dirty joke of the week, repeat last weeks Backwards Game Show, funny NEWS and SPORTS stories (NEW), and a Top Ten list.  Here is the

DIET COKE/MENTOS LINK

**To try and figure out last weeks BACKWARDS WORD, CLICK HERE and submit your answers/guesses to bobandbillshow@gmail.com Also, remember to send us your ideas or requests for a special show ending movie quote, funny clip, etc.  And, don't forget to call us at 206-33-WASTE(9-2783)

Top Ten List that we read off during the show:

TOP TEN SURPRISES IN THE NEW SUPERMAN MOVIE

10.  Brief reference towards his short marriage to Britney Spears
 9.  Scary ending: When Lex Luthor and Jimmy Olsen announce their gay wedding
 8.  President Bush makes an appearance asking for an autograph on his Superman undies
 7.  Superman finds this entry too offensive, destroys it with his heat vision
 6.  The planet Krypton is really just a stripper club
 5.  Because of new technology, Clark Kent is forced to change in a cell phone case instead of a phone booth
 4.  Superman is finished when his true identity is leaked by the government
 3.  In a bizarre twist, Superman admits to using Steroids
 2.  According to the babes, Superman is really super, if you know what I mean...
 1.  His true weakness: He's from Iowa

Episode 11!  We'll be playin' the third song in our "triple play" from Brother Love, we have a phone number now, give it a call and leave us a voicemail

206-33-WASTE(92783)

, College World Series update, e-mails, funny holidays, baseball records, Say What!, Larry the Rabid Ranter, dirty joke of the week, Backwards Game Show and a Top Ten list.  **To try and figure out this weeks BACKWARDS WORD, CLICK HERE and submit your answers/guesses to bobandbillshow@gmail.com

 

Top Ten List that we read off during the show:

TOP TEN REASONS BILL IS PODCASTING FROM A REMOTE LOCATION

10.  Was annoyed that only one babe was available in the studio this week
 9.  Offers chance to say cheap plugs for computer stuff you'll never use
 8.  Decreases chance of Bob interrupting Bill
 7.  Became scared when rumors circulated about possible podcast HGH testing
 6.  Needed safe spot to hide from nasty North Korean missle
 5.  Had to make room for current replacement: Katie Couric
 4.  Now I can finally podcast in the nude
 3.  Beats hassle of having to get a restraining order on our "fan" Carl Spackler
 2.  Bob gets funnier the further away you get
 1.  Three Words: Des Moines Sucks!!

We're in DOUBLE DIGITS!!  Episode 10!  We'll be playin' some more music, College World Series update, e-mails (and Carl Spackler makes a return), funny holidays, baseball records, Say What!, Larry the Rabid Ranter, dirty joke of the week, Backwards Game Show and a Top Ten list that will want to make you say, "gazoontite"  Be sure and listen to the VERY end...there is a special surprise waiting!  **To try and figure out this weeks BACKWARDS WORD, CLICK HERE and submit your answers/guesses to bobandbillshow@gmail.com

Top Ten List that we read off during the show:

TOP TEN LAST WORDS OF ABU MUSAB AL-ZARQAWI

10.  Honey, it's late, can you turn off the explosions and come to bed?
 9.  Bombs? Wait till they see the bomb in my pants
 8.  Gee, this XBOX 360 game sure is life-like
 7.  Good Lord, Cheney's at it again
 6.  Sorry suckers, #6 on this list was already one of my previous victims
 5.  That Alberto is one bitchin' hurricane
 4.  What do you mean I owe postage for these bombs?
 3.  Hey, can you knock off all the gunfire? I'm trying to download the Bob and Bill Show
 2.  Oh my God, I look like Kenny Rogers
 1.  President Bush, I'll see you in hell!

Episode 9 of the Bob and Bill Show, is it EVIL?  It probably is, with over 95 SOUND EFFECTS!!  In this episode we talk about your alcohol scope, the gameshow marathon tv show, the College World Series, funny holidays, e-mails, comments, baseball records, Say What!, Larry the Rabid Ranter, a SPECIAL dirty joke of the week from our friend PHIL, two more clues to last weeks Backwards Game Show and we have the one and only Top Ten list **To try and figure out this weeks BACKWARDS WORD, CLICK HERE and submit your answers/guesses to bobandbillshow@gmail.com

Top Ten List that we read off during the show:

TOP TEN THINGS TO LOOK OUT FOR ON 6/6/06

10.  Crazy cosmic voices telling you the message: "Less filling, Tastes great"
 9.  Silly attempt at comedy in the form of a top ten list about the date 6/6/06
 8.  Creepy visual of excitement surrounding upcoming World Cup
 7.  Bob's drunken rants, Bill crashing wedding dances
 6.  Losers who think this date actually has any meaning to it
 5.  Satan becomes Democratic candidate for Governor because of mis-counted Hanging Chads
 4.  Cheap tacos, because everyone knows it's also Taco Tuesday
 3.  Dyslexic groupies attacking because they finally know the date
 2.  Bob kicking crap out of Vince Vaughn to date Jennifer Aniston
 1.  Anything else to do with numbers because, frankly, math sucks

Is this show, Episode 8 of the Bob and Bill Show any good?  Better ask the Magic Eight Ball!  In this episode we talk about IOWA the movie, (click on to watch the trashy trailer) another funny bumper sticker, funny holidays, e-mails, comments, baseball records, a double dosage of Say What!, Larry the Rabid Ranter, a dirty joke of the week, the return of the Backwards Game Show and we have the one and only Top Ten list, regurgitated from an old Top Ten List archive by Bob. **To try and figure out this weeks BACKWARDS WORD, CLICK HERE and submit your answers/guesses to bobandbillshow@gmail.com

Top Ten List that we read off during the show:

TOP TEN THINGS TO CONSIDER WHEN WATCHING AUTO RACING

10.  Where do they get those outfits? The GAP?
 9.  Can those pit guys do a 30 second job on my car's transmission?
 8.  Don't them drivers get dizzy?
 7.  I think Danica Patrick needs an oil change herself
 6.  I wonder if John Glenn's gonna try this next?
 5.  What kind of thrill is it to hit a wall at 200 MPH?
 4.  Is Jeff Gordon's sister Batgirl?
 3.  I don't think I'm qualified to do that stuff.  I cannot overhaul a 350 cam with dual exhaust
 2.  Dick Trickle--The name says it all
 1.  Hey Dudes, INDY this!

It's the POWER HOUR!  Drink, drink, drink! We talk about funny bumper stickers, website changes, LISTENER Top 10, funny holidays, a song dedicated to drinking beer, e-mails, comments, baseball records (and brawls) a double doseage of Say What! Larry the Rabid Ranter, two dirty jokes of the week, breaking the seal, a SDRAWKCAB (that's backwards) Game Show and we have the one and only Top Ten list all about The Da Vinci Code. **To try and figure out the backwards word, CLICK HERE and submit your answers/guesses to bobandbillshow@gmail.com

Top Ten List that we read off during the show:

TOP TEN WAYS TO CRACK THE DA VINCI CODE

10.  Two Coronas...WITH lime
 9.  They always said calculus was good for something
 8.  Ask the doctor that's kept Elvis alive all these years
 7.  Play the Thriller LP backwards
 6.  The secret's in the sauce
 5.  Look in the bottom of the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow
 4.  Michael Jackson's plastic surgeon obviously knows how to cover up secrets
 3.  There IS something to those Greek letters after all
 2.  Ask Keith Richards...that's what he was searching for when he fell out of the coconut tree
 1.  The decoder in the box of Lucky Charms

Wait till you "HEAR" us this week!  You can finally take the cotton swabs out of your ears to stop the bleeding! We have NEW microphones!  Bob takes over the Say What! segment with TWO rants and raves, but DON'T interrupt him!  Funny holidays, a song dedicated to Mother's Day (and yes it is actually supposed to sound that slow), your e-mails, comments, and also LISTENER requests!  We want YOU to send us a line for the TOP TEN heading of, "Top Ten Places You Would Least Like to Find Sand After Being at the Beach", also, send in funny BUMPER STICKERS you've seen.  Just click on the e-mail link to the right that says bobandbillshow@gmail.com We update the sad stats of professional and fantasy baseball records (fushizzle is #1), Bob's exciting POWER HOUR completion and "post recording", and we have the one and only Top Ten list.  Do you YAHOO? Subscribe to our show by going to this site http://podcasts.yahoo.com/  Just type in Bob and Bill in the "search" and click Subscribe! It's easy and FREE!

Top Ten List that we read off during the show:

TOP TEN THREE DOG NIGHT OR DAHL'S TICKET EXCUSES

10.  Hard to concentrate on singing ONLY HIT with flashing camera bulbs
 9.  Tied up phone lines, blowing load on Kentucky Derby
 8.  Hey, since Springsteen's cutting out seats, we're cutting out internet connections
 7.  Hated idea of having to buy back pictures off E-Bay
 6.  Too busy scalping tickets for "Hairspray"
 5.  Internet lines were tapped by new head of CIA
 4.  Flashes might wake up creepy ghost image of the Big Bopper
 3.  Wanted to become topic for next lame Top Ten List 
 2.  Has-beens don't need pictures taken
 1.  First a picture, then you'll want us to do something crazy like pick coconuts out of a tree

It's CINCO DE MAYO WEEK..what a coincidence, it's our FIFTH podcast!  In this installment, we talk about a BIG SURPRISE for everybody, what "went down" during Drake Relays, Bill's embarrasing birthday experience, funny holidays, Monk e-mail, professional and fantasy baseball records, Say What?! Yep! That segment returns.  We also have the weekly Dirty Joke of the Week read by Bob, the relation between George Foreman and IOWA, a song from one of Bob's friend, and the one and only Top Ten list.  Want to send us a MONKEY E-Mail?  Click here! and be sure and put our e-mail address in there as well bobandbillshow@gmail.com

Top Ten List that we read off during the show:

TOP TEN KEITH RICHARDS EXCUSES

10.  Wanted to be the hit in the group's next hit song
 9.  Became confused between picking coconuts and landing on his
 8.  Realized Dick Cheney was having target practice a couple of trees over
 7.  Got tired of same old "sex, drugs, rock and roll" story, figured concussion would spice things up a bit
 6.  Wanted to be buried in Iowa
 5.  Figured falling out of a tree is good exercise for a 62-year-old man
 4.  Fastest way to come down after getting high
 3.  Needed a head start at finding any buried treasure
 2.  Wanted to steal spotlight away from other drugged up celebrities like George Bush
 1.  Showed everyone what the group meant by "a bigger bang"

It's DRAKE RELAYS WEEK here in Des Moines, IA and it's also our topic for Episode #4.  Tonight's show had a NEW FEATURE called "Say What?! We also have the weekly Dirty Joke of the Week, funny holidays, which you can check out by clicking here, some funny Beer Drinking music, and the one and only Top Ten list.  Oh and we can't forget SOUND EFFECTS GALORE!!

Top Ten List that we read off during the show:

TOP TEN THINGS TO LOOK FOR DURING DRAKE RELAYS WEEKEND

10.  The phone number for Alcoholics Anonymous, because you'll need it after this weekend
 9.  This tip: Make sure when you're outrunning the cops you take off your track cleats first
 8. Real people who actually care about High School or College track
 7.  EXIT STRATEGY for ridiculous overseas war 
 6.  Another way to cheat with state money, just like those CIETC people
 5.  All the fun that didn't happen at Veishea last weekend
 4.  This tip: You know you're having a good time when your face is as blue as the new outdoor track
 3.  Make sure when you mention "heat", you're talking about the TRACK term 
 2.  Cheap gasoline, yeah, GOOD LUCK with that one!
 1.  Some place safe where you can hand your girlfriend your baton

It's TAX WEEK, and you guessed it, it's our topic for Episode #3. We couldn't be in better form, actually yes, we could, because we've both been sick!  Maybe a little too much dedication on getting out the weekly podcast.  Tonight's show we talked about Tax Show Spectacular, funny Sidney Ponson clips, the NEW feature of the week, Dirty Joke of the Week, some funny TAX music, water massages, turtle cheesecake, Veishea and the one and only Top Ten list.  Oh and we can't forget SOUND EFFECTS GALORE!!  Sorry for the bad audio in some spots.  We will eventually fix this!

Top Ten List that we read off during the show:

TOP TEN BOB AND BILL 2006 TAX TIPS

10.  Get lame podcast show to write off as business expense
 9.  Write lame Top Ten list for lame podcast show to write off as business expense
 8.  You can never go wrong with big company accountants, just like those geniuses from Haliburton
 7.  Marry a hooker because most hookers don't pay income taxes 
 6.  E-file using your own extension
 5.  Chicks dig abacuses
 4.  Easy to cheat government with the information the President leaks
 3.  Cut expenses by hiring Pete Rose's accountant 
 2.  Invest in a good seat cushion because you'll need it after paying out your ass
 1.  Don't get caught playing with your W-2!

This is our second podcast and you're still listening?! Tonight's show we talked about baseball and especially Sidney Ponson, Oxygen Bars, we had a GREAT parody of a Garth Brooks song Star Wars style, a great recipe, the one and only Top Ten list, electric boogaloo and SOUND EFFECTS GALORE!!  ENJOY!!
Top Ten List that we read off during the show:

 

TOP TEN DES MOINES DRIVING TIPS

10.  Tailgate as close as you can so you can read those pesky little license plate letters
 9.  Construction obstacles make freeway driving much easier
 8.  Keep local insurance industry thriving by causing more accidents
 7.  80 MPH + icy roads = FUN!!
 6.  Shoot hunting companion...no, wait, that's a Dick Cheney hunting tip
 5.  Hawkeye or Cyclone game nights justify attempted vehicular homicide on your way home
 4.  Cheat people out of lots of money and then resign from your state job, no, wait, that's a CIETC (Central Iowa Employment and Training Consortium) tip
 3.  Driver's side doors are overrated
 2.  Supervisors work out great for drunk cops who are speeding
 1.  Find the quickest route to get the hell out of town!

This is our very first podcast so if it sounds bad....it probably is!!  Bare with us, IT WILL GET BETTER!!  This first show we talked about where we've been and what we've been doing the past 9 years, opening day of baseball and our teams (Cubs and Orioles)...and of course we can't forget THE WEEKLY TOP TEN LIST!  We also have a SPONSOR!!  Please check his site out at rosterdownloads.com  And, here's a quick look at the Top Ten List that we read off during the show:

TOP TEN THINGS BOB AND BILL HAVE BEEN UP TO
OVER THE PAST 9 YEARS

10.  Knee deep in hookers and Viagra
 9.  Panty raiding the sorority houses
 8.  Bob:  married to Britney Spears once, Bill: married to Britney Spears twice
 7.  Whooping it up with a Guatemala Antigua at Starbucks
 6.  I have no idea, but Barry Bonds has already hit five home runs while we have been reading this list
 5.  Prison
 4.  Bob:  dead,  Bill: driving truck
 3.  Eating all the spam saved for Y2K.
 2.  Obviously not getting any funnier
 1.  Celebrating the best damn 9 years of our lives